One of the many lessons that God has been teaching me that last, oh i would say year is how i say that I want Him to be in control of my life... and then i somehow try to be in control again. Here comes the light bulb moment…the only way for God to be IN control of my life is for me to be OUT of control of my life. Seems simple enough. I want to relinquish complete control to Him and to His will and yet how often do I attempt to take back the reigns, to do it my way…all too often I'm afraid. Being “out of control” is not something I do well.
There is no doubt He has my best interest at heart and can do an immeasurably better job than I can at running my life. Who am I to think I know whats best? While I know these things to be true, the first sign of trouble sends me running to those old ways. control it. fix it. make it right. I am learning daily to live my life with hands open and raised to Him, not clenched and held tightly to my heart. By giving up control of my life, I am gaining a peace that passes all understanding and learning to walk more closely with the One who truly is in control.